Seek HIM First

This week we’re reading chapter 12 of Balancing It All by Candace Cameron Bure. This chapter could not have come at a better time for me! In this chapter, Candace talks a lot about looking to God to help you make decisions in your life. She reminds us, “The Bible says we are to seek Him first – not our feelings, not the world, not our peers, not logic. I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t always do what He says or what I know is right, but I do know that He will give me the best guidance, whether I decide to take it or not.”

Here’s a glimpse at what’s going on in my life right now; Taylor is looking for a job, which many of you probably already knew. This week I have been filled with anxiety and I’m really struggling to keep it under control. In the last few weeks he has had interviews with three companies. Company #1 really wanted him and we really wanted that job to work out since it would take us back home with our families, but after prayer and considering all the aspects of the job, we both agreed that it just wasn’t the right position for him. Company #2 was the one we were most hopeful for, but unfortunately they did not offer him a position. I know in my heart that God has a reason for not opening that door for us, but I’m still disappointed. Company #3 is dragging the interview process out for what seems like forever. He has interview #3 with them this afternoon. Right now that is his only real lead on a job, but both of us agree that a small part of us hope they don’t offer him the position because we really aren’t convinced that we would financially be able to make it with that one (which I think says a lot).

{For those of you who are reading this right now and saying “didn’t all that happen last month?” I’ll let you in on a little secret. In order for me to balance it all in my life, I write my blog posts several weeks ahead of time so that they’ll still go out on time even when life gets too crazy for me to write in a given week.}

I’m beginning to wonder if God is using this anxiety to tell me that this job isn’t right for us either. When we talked about the first offer, as much as we both wanted him to get a job in that location, we both knew that it wasn’t right. I was completely at peace with the decision as soon as we made it. That certainly doesn’t mean I wasn’t disappointed that we weren’t going to be moving home, but I knew without a doubt that God was telling us not to take that job. Looking back on other times that we had major life decisions to make, I remember feeling that peace inside every time we made a decision based on prayerful consideration, which just emphasizes to me that as long as we allow God to be in the driver’s seat of our lives, everything will turn out just right.

As I read this chapter yesterday I tried to look at it from the perspective that God will lead us where He wants us to go, but my thinking was still that our path would probably be to go with Company #3. However, we both had a major meltdown last night. I shared with him that I had been feeling very anxious this week, but I wasn’t certain what was making me feel that way. Then he shared with me that he was very stressed by looking at the financial ramifications of accepting this position if it is offered to him because we would be moving to Washington, DC, which has at least twice the cost of living that we’re used to. As we talked, his stress made me more anxious and my anxiety made him more stressed.

Whatever the outcome of the job search is, I know that I need to focus on God’s promise that He will lead us where we need to go as long as we seek His will for our lives. I hope that this reminder from Candace will help me do just that. “The Bible says, ‘Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act’ (Psalm 37:5)…Val and I knew that even though we might have our own plans of what we wanted to happen, we needed to leave it up to God and put it in His hands. Though sometimes it’s hard to let go, I’ve learned over the years that when I give up my hold on my own dreams and desires and instead trust God with them, He will come through in ways that I never could have imagined.”

I know that the best thing for me to do right now, is to give this whole situation to God and to let Him be in control. I’ve found that when I try to take back control from God, I get overwhelmed and anxious, and that’s definitely not a position I want to be in.

Weekly Challenge:

I encourage you to take a step back and evaluate how you handle decision making. If decision making is something that causes arguments or strife in your marriage, I hope that you will consider what Candace has said. “The Bible says we are to seek Him first – not our feelings, not the world, not our peers, not logic.” When you and your spouse are both seeking God’s will in your decision making, I can tell you from experience, that it is a whole lot less stressful.

With Love,

Kristin

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